This time last year I had already had some of my most memorable moments of Summer 2010. This time last year I had could lay in the grass anywhere, even places I didn't entirely want to be, as long as I was with my best friends drinking icees and I could feel so free and content and happy no matter what the circumstance. This time last year I had so much to look forward to, when I already had so much.
This time this year, Summer has yet to feel like it's begun. In some senses it's felt like Summer forever, and maybe that's part of the problem; Maybe summer loses it's meaning when your life can feel like summer all the time. But it doesn't feel like it's begun in the sense where I look back and already had so many amazing experiences, it doesn't feel like I have so much too look forward to still when I don't even know what I'm doing, where I'm headed or what to expect (not in the good way). It doesn't feel like this time this year is going to compare at all to the last, even when I know those times now wouldn't mean quite as much as they did then. I guess I just expect progression in every Summer being better than the last, and maybe that's part of the problem and maybe that's just my fault. It does however feel like summer is going to end before it begins and that scares the living hell out of me.
Coming home and realizing it's not home anymore is a strange feeling to cope with and not one I usually choose to; But it's even more hard realizing the place you're more comfortable is somewhere you're hardly comfortable at all.
Where am I going?
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