Monday, May 25, 2009
Sunday, May 24, 2009
When people I don't like call me Tes, it makes me want to kick them in the teeth. Nicknames are reserved for people I love.
Last night was mewithoutYou's Album Release show. It was beyond wonderful, even if a little sad. (SO much better than the Newark show. They were missing something that day.) That is still my favorite band.
I spoke to Aaron Weiss afterwards and gave him a hug, I admire that man more than I'd think possible. He makes me feel like it's alright to believe whatever I believe. I wish I could be as genuinely good of a person as him. After the show Stacy and me walked to the fountain and sat around talking til around 2 am. I love that girl, my closest thing to a best friend, I love mwy, I love Philadelphia. This summer is going to make some lasting memories.
Last night was mewithoutYou's Album Release show. It was beyond wonderful, even if a little sad. (SO much better than the Newark show. They were missing something that day.) That is still my favorite band.
I spoke to Aaron Weiss afterwards and gave him a hug, I admire that man more than I'd think possible. He makes me feel like it's alright to believe whatever I believe. I wish I could be as genuinely good of a person as him. After the show Stacy and me walked to the fountain and sat around talking til around 2 am. I love that girl, my closest thing to a best friend, I love mwy, I love Philadelphia. This summer is going to make some lasting memories.
Saturday, May 16, 2009
no title
I never update as much as I'd like. I really want to start writing about everything again, just so I'll always be able to go back and read about times I otherwise may have forgotten. And even if I haven't forgotten them, I definitely won't be able to feel how I did back when they first happened. I want to be able to read about things years later and be able to relive them for a few minutes, however pointless that may be. So, I'm going to start trying to do that more again.
Last night I went with Andrew B and Nick to see Moving Mountains in Philly. They were absolutely mind blowing. I don't even like using the word epic because it's so overused now, but that's the only way to describe it. You know a band is good live when they play almost all songs you don't know, but you still thought it was amazing. Which is what happened, they played all new songs from their EP that just came out, and only one old one. But the kind of music they play just being blasted into your face like that, it was still, well..amazing.
I've been working a lot lately, and I hate it. The only thing that keeps me going is that I hate being broke like I am right now and after all this, my next two paychecks are going to be great. Which reminds me, I need to finish Eric's mixes today to take to work tomorrow (at 6 am, again :( )
Other than that, in the past few weeks and lately:
- Since like December I've slowly lost 20 lbs. I feel like the next 20 is going to be easier only because I've gotten progressively better at eating and working out more, I've just been slacking lately on the gym because I've been at work most nights and waking up early is just not an option. That'll change soon, because I'd like the rest of the weight gone through out summer and especially by the time I move to Philly. No matter what it takes.
- Stacy and Brittany are home for summer, I can't wait til we all have a little more cash and better weather. I know we're going to get into so much in the next few months.
-I don't think Sound and Fury is happening anymore, although I'll still probably be in California around that time. It kind of depends on if Ashley wants to go with me or not. I'm not all that bummed since This Is Hardcore is going to be so good this year anyways. I know for sure I need a trip out to California though, and Arizona for at least a few days too. I just don't know when, I feel like time this summer isn't very abundant. Not with shows limiting the time inbetween, most of June being tour, not wanting to be away during my birthday, and having to be home for TIH and moving to Philly only a few days after that. I hope I can fit in everything I want to do, but either way being that busy is going to make for some amazing memories.
-On Tuesday Tyler and me went to a secret Fireworks show in a West Philly. It was in the same Basement I saw Defeater a few months ago. I love seeing Fireworks, but I'm pretty sure I'll go to see them in Baltimore whenever possible from now on. The wigger Chester kids always show up to their Philly shows and completely ruin it.
-Last Sunday The Sleeping and Paulson played the Grange. I went and hung out with Liz and (her)Lauren. I hadn't seen them in so long, it's always a good time. Although the show was so empty that Paulson wasn't as fun as usual and The Sleeping played almost all new songs, I still respect that band a lot though..which isn't something I say too often. The strange part was hanging out with them and Kyle at the same time. It didn't feel awkward but just thinking about it in my mind..never in my life would I have believed someone if they told me one day I'd be standing with Liz on one side and Kyle to my other in harmony. My. Life.
-Brittany and me went to see Defiance, Ohio and earlier in the day us+Stacy walked 400 miles to Gianna's. I love that city, that band, that food, those girls. The show was sooo good, even though I really only listen to things on Share What Ya Got most of the time. I've been listening to more lately though, seeing a band play songs live can always do that for me.
-I haven't been hanging out with many people lately, probably because I've been working a good amount and the people I have felt like seeing aren't the usual. I just can't get down with some of the crowds my best friends are with. I do see Melissa once in awhile, I also feel a lack of my boys being in my life..mostly due to a lack of shows we'd all go to and a lack of their shows. I just recently noticed Garrett's absence in my life, I got kind of used to going somewhere with him like once a week. I'm still not trying to concern myself with friendships much though, I'm still trying to remember how to be okay on my own. Which seems to be working, at least a little. I'm not as miserable as usual at all.
Last night I went with Andrew B and Nick to see Moving Mountains in Philly. They were absolutely mind blowing. I don't even like using the word epic because it's so overused now, but that's the only way to describe it. You know a band is good live when they play almost all songs you don't know, but you still thought it was amazing. Which is what happened, they played all new songs from their EP that just came out, and only one old one. But the kind of music they play just being blasted into your face like that, it was still, well..amazing.
I've been working a lot lately, and I hate it. The only thing that keeps me going is that I hate being broke like I am right now and after all this, my next two paychecks are going to be great. Which reminds me, I need to finish Eric's mixes today to take to work tomorrow (at 6 am, again :( )
Other than that, in the past few weeks and lately:
- Since like December I've slowly lost 20 lbs. I feel like the next 20 is going to be easier only because I've gotten progressively better at eating and working out more, I've just been slacking lately on the gym because I've been at work most nights and waking up early is just not an option. That'll change soon, because I'd like the rest of the weight gone through out summer and especially by the time I move to Philly. No matter what it takes.
- Stacy and Brittany are home for summer, I can't wait til we all have a little more cash and better weather. I know we're going to get into so much in the next few months.
-I don't think Sound and Fury is happening anymore, although I'll still probably be in California around that time. It kind of depends on if Ashley wants to go with me or not. I'm not all that bummed since This Is Hardcore is going to be so good this year anyways. I know for sure I need a trip out to California though, and Arizona for at least a few days too. I just don't know when, I feel like time this summer isn't very abundant. Not with shows limiting the time inbetween, most of June being tour, not wanting to be away during my birthday, and having to be home for TIH and moving to Philly only a few days after that. I hope I can fit in everything I want to do, but either way being that busy is going to make for some amazing memories.
-On Tuesday Tyler and me went to a secret Fireworks show in a West Philly. It was in the same Basement I saw Defeater a few months ago. I love seeing Fireworks, but I'm pretty sure I'll go to see them in Baltimore whenever possible from now on. The wigger Chester kids always show up to their Philly shows and completely ruin it.
-Last Sunday The Sleeping and Paulson played the Grange. I went and hung out with Liz and (her)Lauren. I hadn't seen them in so long, it's always a good time. Although the show was so empty that Paulson wasn't as fun as usual and The Sleeping played almost all new songs, I still respect that band a lot though..which isn't something I say too often. The strange part was hanging out with them and Kyle at the same time. It didn't feel awkward but just thinking about it in my mind..never in my life would I have believed someone if they told me one day I'd be standing with Liz on one side and Kyle to my other in harmony. My. Life.
-Brittany and me went to see Defiance, Ohio and earlier in the day us+Stacy walked 400 miles to Gianna's. I love that city, that band, that food, those girls. The show was sooo good, even though I really only listen to things on Share What Ya Got most of the time. I've been listening to more lately though, seeing a band play songs live can always do that for me.
-I haven't been hanging out with many people lately, probably because I've been working a good amount and the people I have felt like seeing aren't the usual. I just can't get down with some of the crowds my best friends are with. I do see Melissa once in awhile, I also feel a lack of my boys being in my life..mostly due to a lack of shows we'd all go to and a lack of their shows. I just recently noticed Garrett's absence in my life, I got kind of used to going somewhere with him like once a week. I'm still not trying to concern myself with friendships much though, I'm still trying to remember how to be okay on my own. Which seems to be working, at least a little. I'm not as miserable as usual at all.
Friday, May 8, 2009
Now everything's imaginary, especially what you love.
So much has gone. But sometimes so little. While I'm out and about I have thoughts that I want to write (or type, I suppose) but whenever I actually have the time, I lose the urge.
I've been feeling so lost and so found at the same time lately. I'm not sure what to make of it yet, but I'm feeling like the answers aren't too far away. One thing I am sure of though, is for the first time I truely decided to take someones advice, and I did, and it worked. I had become so dependent on others for my happiness. That needed to stop, and it did. I've detached myself enough to the point where I can get to know myself again, where I can stand my own company and not think of myself by the company I keep but by who I am when it's just that..just me. The trick now is finding the balance between distancing myself from the dependency I created but with out pushing the people I became dependent on away, because I still want them around..I just don't want to NEED them around to function properly.
So much has gone. But sometimes so little. While I'm out and about I have thoughts that I want to write (or type, I suppose) but whenever I actually have the time, I lose the urge.
I've been feeling so lost and so found at the same time lately. I'm not sure what to make of it yet, but I'm feeling like the answers aren't too far away. One thing I am sure of though, is for the first time I truely decided to take someones advice, and I did, and it worked. I had become so dependent on others for my happiness. That needed to stop, and it did. I've detached myself enough to the point where I can get to know myself again, where I can stand my own company and not think of myself by the company I keep but by who I am when it's just that..just me. The trick now is finding the balance between distancing myself from the dependency I created but with out pushing the people I became dependent on away, because I still want them around..I just don't want to NEED them around to function properly.
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