Always

I miss everything. I miss things I didn't even ever think I'd miss. I miss things I don't feel like I should have to miss, they got away too fast. I'm so happy with how things are right now, but it doesn't mean they'll ever compare to some of the past. I miss such random situations. I miss last year's beach trips and screaming at the top of our lungs on the dragon ride and singing vanessa carlton on late nights drives home and dinner after the sunset on the beach with a community cup. I miss when Algernon was our little secret and their shows were nothing but all of us traveling to ridiculous places to see them and sing our hearts out and smile at each other and have big group hugs afterwards. I miss driving up to Newark after school my senior year just to sit at the diner with Melissa and Tyler and how n one meant as much to me as them. I miss Melissa Stafford when she was my best friend in the entire world, when people would see one of us and automatically wonder where the other was. I miss baking cakes and decorating Harvey's car for "christ day". I miss random acts of kindness and leaving cute post it notes on stranger's cars. I miss spending every weekend in winter '07 at the grange and hearing my name in every direction. I miss when my gas light was always on, but it "doesn't mean anything". I miss driving all the way to Pittsburgh to see Jesse Lacey play. I miss sitting in McDonalds parking lots until 1 am just talking about anything. I miss driving up onto Tyler's lawn in the ice to get his drums for yet another show. I miss leaving shows to go eat cheese fries at the diner. I miss afterschool homework sessions that turn into days spent drinking hot chocolate playing cards. I miss the winter shows in Jersey, always being the only girl, driving my boys to all their shows and freezing my feet off but never feeling more content. I miss ubf. I miss driving all the way to connecticut with Garrett and surf and tappanzee bridge and getting stuck in a foot of snow in my mom's trailblazer and how awesome we were for getting it out. I miss making a bed on Dara's floor and watching horribly made horror movies all night while eating pretzels and cream cheese and never stopping laughing. I miss Alex Souders and how he'd hold my hand when we were at Africa and I was scared. I miss new york trips where we get followed by bums and fall over on the subway and "events of epic proportions". I miss devil's road trips every weekend last fall. I miss when Fair Hill was such a huge part of our life, our other little secret. I miss driving around PA trying to get lost, listening to the early november. I miss when Tyler would call me and wake me up every single morning yelling about random things or leaving ridiculous voicemails. I miss when every fucking got along, and driving around in circles with Andrew B, Nick, and Melissa singing Soco. I miss
i miss
i miss
i miss